That’s right, I said it. A sandwich.

This dude, James Hobbs, had his throat slashed by Jamie Edney when Hobbs, after buying a sandwich, stopped in at Edney’s house to confront him for having an alleged affair with his girlfriend. The two got into a fight and Edney ended up slashing Hobbs’ throat. As he was bleeding out (he lost 6.5 pints of blood!) he did what any man would do in that situation, he plugged up the gushing gash in his throat with……. you guessed it, HIS SANDWICH!!! Good thing he hadn’t been in the mood for soup, he would have been screwed.

True fucking story.

Original story: here